Dude, you weren't even there when the WHOL latched on to your mother and me.

WHOL: My dear, I don't believe we've met, I'm XXXX, and I've been going to this church for the last bazillion years.
Joyce: I've been a member of this church for the last 20 years, and have been on several committees.
WHOL: (not comprehending) Ohhh...
(several awkward seconds of her not recognizing either one of us and saying so repeatedly)
Joyce: I was here yesterday running my husband's memorial service.
WHOL: (perking up) Oh, really? Ohhh...
RXM: Hey, Look, Here Comes The Manager, Let's Go Into His Office Right Now.
WHOL: So much grief and sadness, my dear, you must be crushed...
Joyce: I'm a little sad, but I'm fine for the most part-- hello Ken, shall we meet?
Ken: (looks rushed) Yes!
WHOL: DOOM DOOM DOOM
RXM: Let's Go Into Your Office and Plan the Wedding, Ken.
WHOL: DOOM DOO- eh! Wedding?! (expectant look)
RXM: (Oh crap)

Your mom was definitely nibbling her own leg off...