(Hey, dancingshamen and silverstreak started it! Blame them for their "You did so well, we're going to keeeeeel you" attitude! It's THEIR fault!)
Now here's the problem with the doomsday device. Even leaving aside the fact that I haven't been compensated for any loss for a one-of-a-kind heirloom, there is the fact that as a rascal, I know that the biggest rascals out there are nations and governments; I know for a fact that they are completely untrustworthy. I don't care how nice or shaman-y or goddess-y Ussuria is, once the government of Ussuria, make that ANY government gets wind of that device, it's going to be deemed too important to dispose of, goddess or no. Goddesses can be appeased, while governments are greedy, rapacious beasts that devour their young. And speaking of which, what nation would allow people who know of a doomsday device to roam free? All nations know that dangerous secrets are best kept secret when all potentially loose lips are dead. I promised your safety, and it would pain me seriously for you to reach the shores of your country only to be cut down by your countrymen- the moreso, since I would have to deal with the pain of being slaughtered as well.
(Why, I heard even as I boarded the ship that a couple untrustworthy and violent ruffians will be waiting for us with swords drawn! And they have at least one ally on the ship even now! You see how deep the treachery extends!)
And even if I accept the protestations that no, no, Ussaria is unique among all the nations in all of history in that it's rulers can be trusted, can you trust the OTHER nations of the world? Can you be sure Ussaria will remain inviolate when the news of this gets out? Can you be sure that there were no listening ears when you exclaimed over my trinket? Can you be absolutely sure that even now, there are no fleets mustering to claim the device for their own? I surely don't.
No, the safest thing is to wrap the watch in lead, put it in a bronze box sealed with tin, put that box in a lead box sealed with bronze bands, put the whole thing in a spare canon, stopper it up with lead, and drop the whole thing overboard, 100 leagues from the nearest land, into the deepest sea where even the greatest master of Porte cannot retrieve it.
If you have any love for the safety of your countrymen or the world at large, I'm sure you'll agree this is the best thing for all.
no subject
Now here's the problem with the doomsday device. Even leaving aside the fact that I haven't been compensated for any loss for a one-of-a-kind heirloom, there is the fact that as a rascal, I know that the biggest rascals out there are nations and governments; I know for a fact that they are completely untrustworthy. I don't care how nice or shaman-y or goddess-y Ussuria is, once the government of Ussuria, make that ANY government gets wind of that device, it's going to be deemed too important to dispose of, goddess or no. Goddesses can be appeased, while governments are greedy, rapacious beasts that devour their young. And speaking of which, what nation would allow people who know of a doomsday device to roam free? All nations know that dangerous secrets are best kept secret when all potentially loose lips are dead. I promised your safety, and it would pain me seriously for you to reach the shores of your country only to be cut down by your countrymen- the moreso, since I would have to deal with the pain of being slaughtered as well.
(Why, I heard even as I boarded the ship that a couple untrustworthy and violent ruffians will be waiting for us with swords drawn! And they have at least one ally on the ship even now! You see how deep the treachery extends!)
And even if I accept the protestations that no, no, Ussaria is unique among all the nations in all of history in that it's rulers can be trusted, can you trust the OTHER nations of the world? Can you be sure Ussaria will remain inviolate when the news of this gets out? Can you be sure that there were no listening ears when you exclaimed over my trinket? Can you be absolutely sure that even now, there are no fleets mustering to claim the device for their own? I surely don't.
No, the safest thing is to wrap the watch in lead, put it in a bronze box sealed with tin, put that box in a lead box sealed with bronze bands, put the whole thing in a spare canon, stopper it up with lead, and drop the whole thing overboard, 100 leagues from the nearest land, into the deepest sea where even the greatest master of Porte cannot retrieve it.
If you have any love for the safety of your countrymen or the world at large, I'm sure you'll agree this is the best thing for all.