I can play, but then, I'm your wife. Risus better not be harder than setting the microwave clock, or I'm gonna do this:

I wanna play a lesbian vampire ninja elf with F-cup boobs and a sword like Cloud Strife's. Only it is also like a katana. Who is dark and mystery-like. (me, not the sword) I wear a trenchcoat to hide the sword and also because I am totally a stripper. I work for the government, only it's the cool government, where I can have rad cars and shoot people and take off my clothes for money, not the real government, which only has CalPERS and you only get paid once a month.