The Jokes Just Write Themseves...

From The CBS article "Military Soft On Don't Ask, Don't Tell?"

"We aren't the Brits. We're not the Europeans. We're not the Swedes," says Republican Congressman Duncan Hunter, who is the ranking member of the House Armed Services Committee.

Hunter argues that gays do not belong in the U.S. military because American troops need to be hardened warriors, unlike soldiers in the 15 NATO countries where gays serve openly.

I mean seriously. I couldn't write stuff this good.  Especially when they start talking about Spartans later on in the article.  Woo!  Wave your spears, guys!

(WTF) What's next? A Child's Book of Botox?

Having a hard time explaining to your child why mommy's body issues are going to result in mommy wearing bandages over her tummy, boobs and nose?  Well never fear, there's a book for you:  My Beautiful Mommy.

It uses metaphors like caterpillars and coccoons to make the idea of plastic surgerycomforting.  It also explains that mommy couldn't fit into her old clothing any more, because she got old...therefore she needs to make herself look prettier.

See?




If your mother has had the problem of looking like a real person with a bumpy nose, NO PROBLEM!!  We can turn mommy into an older version of Kim Possible!  Daddy will like her MUCH better now, and stop working weekends with that tramp of a secretary! 





Seriously, I can see why children might be frightened and confused by a parent going into plastic surgery, but this book is massively self-serving, and the idea that "Mommy needed to be prettier" is just perfect for raising up a new generation of kids who think that everything will be perfect if they just have a straight nose or larger breasts.  Which, come to think of it, will be perfect for drumming up more business for the doctor.

Come to think of it, children are having cosmetic surgery at a younger and younger age, aren't they?  Just what sort of business IS this doctor trying to drum up?