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I've decided that after today, my best career choice is to be an internet pundit. I'm doing this not because I particularly like internet screeds, but because after trying out the new experimental HTML internetpundit markup tags, I've found it's so easy there's no reason not to be an intent pundit.
I'll show you how easy it is! First I have to decide how long I want my screed to be. For my example,I'll just do a paragraph, but the tags can encompass screeds up to 1 million characters long. I select a blank space as large as I want, and put the tags around it, like so:
[internetpundit]
[/internetpundit]
Then when I post, the HTML internet pundit system converts the spaces into prose, using a program similar to the Postmodern Essay Generator, like so:
[internetpundit]The scandal surrounding embattled Illinois Gov. Rod Blagojevich is simply another example of the dire straits the Obama presidency is in. Looking back at the last 38 days since the election, an observer has to ask: just what have they managed to accomplish? Has Obama managed to get us out of Iraq? Has he defeated the terrorists? Of course not. Nor has he managed to deal with Russia and China, or solved the problem of global warming and weaning us off of imported oil. He hasn't even gotten his health care reforms passed. The promises and hope that the Obama administration came in with have remained unfulfilled dreams, so, with less than two months to go before the inauguration, it's fair to say that historians can already categorize this as a failed administration.[/internetpundit]
Voila! One essay on a random topic! Admittedly one can't choose one's subject to pontificate on, but the very randomness of the rants helps match the freewheeling writing style of your average internet pundit, where a post on international politics can be right next to an account of fixing linguine from grandma's old recipe. Though it's still in beta testing, I'm very excited about the electronic frontiers this new sytem offers; when it goes fully online, anybody can be an internet pundit, regardless of coherent thought or writing ability. Just like today.
I'll show you how easy it is! First I have to decide how long I want my screed to be. For my example,I'll just do a paragraph, but the tags can encompass screeds up to 1 million characters long. I select a blank space as large as I want, and put the tags around it, like so:
[internetpundit]
[/internetpundit]
Then when I post, the HTML internet pundit system converts the spaces into prose, using a program similar to the Postmodern Essay Generator, like so:
[internetpundit]The scandal surrounding embattled Illinois Gov. Rod Blagojevich is simply another example of the dire straits the Obama presidency is in. Looking back at the last 38 days since the election, an observer has to ask: just what have they managed to accomplish? Has Obama managed to get us out of Iraq? Has he defeated the terrorists? Of course not. Nor has he managed to deal with Russia and China, or solved the problem of global warming and weaning us off of imported oil. He hasn't even gotten his health care reforms passed. The promises and hope that the Obama administration came in with have remained unfulfilled dreams, so, with less than two months to go before the inauguration, it's fair to say that historians can already categorize this as a failed administration.[/internetpundit]
Voila! One essay on a random topic! Admittedly one can't choose one's subject to pontificate on, but the very randomness of the rants helps match the freewheeling writing style of your average internet pundit, where a post on international politics can be right next to an account of fixing linguine from grandma's old recipe. Though it's still in beta testing, I'm very excited about the electronic frontiers this new sytem offers; when it goes fully online, anybody can be an internet pundit, regardless of coherent thought or writing ability. Just like today.